I was getting ready to snuggle up in bed Tuesday night when I decided to take a look at my Instagram feed. Between the memes, hockey highlights, and personal pictures I noticed a number of red and black graphic images appearing and reappearing in my story.
The first two or three times I saw the graphic I quickly scrolled by. I hardly had the mental energy to read a veritable wall of runes before nap time, but finally after seeing the same graphic shared by my peers so many times I decided to click and read. Surely it must have some importance if it’s been so widely shared.
What was it? Did Tom Brady unretire yet again and sign with the Jets? Was it raising relief for the people of Turkey and Syria? Were we in a thermonuclear war with the People’s Republic of China? No, it was far more dramatic than any of these scenarios. Connecticut College’s Dean of Institutional Equity and Inclusion resigned.
Stop the presses!
February 7th, 2023: a date that will live in infamy. I know what you’re all thinking. How will Connecticut College manage to go on? Will the school year end early and all the students be sent home? C students everywhere are asking if this qualifies as a technical passing by catastrophe?
I don’t want to dash your hopes, but I have complete confidence in Connecticut College’s ability to survive even without Dean Rodmon King, because I have complete confidence in our Dear Leader, the great helmsman of our alma mater by the sea, President Bergeron “Our hearts in love are lifted to thee.”
Can I get a whale whistle solo?
Now, I’m being a bit tongue-in-cheek, perhaps even a little bit facetious. Some would even say a tiny bit deliberately provocative. I reject these charges and challenge any of my would-be-critics to look at the record of the articles I have published at The Conntrarian and find even one instance of me attempting to shock the fragile sensitivities of my liberal viewership.
So to return to the matter at hand, what is the controversy? The Instagram account @blackvoicesconncoll very kindly tells us. In a widely shared post liked some 700 times (more than a third of Connecticut College’s current student body) the charges are laid bare:
Apparently in an attempt to raise money, and presumably book a nice paid “working” vacation to the fascist dystopia Florida (AKA “The Sunshine State''), President Bergeron chose to host a fundraising event at “THE EVERGLADES CLUB” an, allegedly, “notoriously ANTI-BLACK and ANTISEMITIC social club.'' How exactly a social club can be anti-black and antisemitic is a little bit above my paygrade, but fortunately for all of us somebody at Connecticut College is paid big bucks to contemplate these deep questions: enter Dean King.
Every ship that sailed in the Spanish Armada had a priest, in the Red Army every unit had a political commissar, and in modern America every college has a Dean of Institutional Equity and Inclusion. The function each plays in their respective system is essentially identical: to ensure ideological purity and orthodoxy and in each system this aim is held as a higher goal than the success of the organization managed by the clerical class. For the Spanish, Soviet, and College alike, purity of doctrine is more important than military or academic success in any traditional sense.
President Bergeron clearly failed to understand this dynamic; she knew well enough that she would have to justify her vacation plans with the ideology safeguarded by Dean King. But she imagined the ideology he safeguards serves to justify her actions and that, like a Byzantine Emperor or Saudi King, she could make her chief religious advisor justify practically any action taken by the college administration, no matter how repugnant to state orthodoxy. “[President Bergeron] told him to prepare a statement in defense of this choice,” @blackvoicesconncoll iterated.
But Dean King is not like the Chief Imam of Saudi Arabia, he is like a powerful medieval Pope capable and willing to go toe-to-toe with the highest political power: Holy Roman Emperor, French King, or College President and emerge victorious. It may look like he has fled Rome with his resignation, but the chorus of public whining, er… I mean “activism,” of the Connecticut College Connmunity will transform him overnight into a hot commodity in the fastest growing industry in America: professional race hustling.
And like any shakedown, the subtext of the message is obvious to anyone with eyes to see and ears to hear: give us more money.
@blackvoicesconncoll: “DIEI is overworked, underpaid, and constantly disrespected.” Emphasis on underpaid.
If President Bergeron is to survive this crisis no doubt it will come at the cost of a hefty paycheck and if she doesn’t sign it, her successor will.
The age of ultramontanism is well underway on America’s college campuses, we can only pray that the age of Luther comes soon to break this antichrist’s reign.
To return from metahistory to the immediate, there are many real criticisms of President Bergeron. Chiefly and illustrated by this incident, she is a liberal who will cave to the insane, insatiable, and moralizing demands of the college community she presides over. As the post says, “KG cancelled the event within 24 hours of its scheduled start in fear of community backlash.”
Obviously, this was a mistake, even canceling the event is not enough. She would be in precisely the same situation had she said ‘damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead’ or better yet, canceled the event and rescheduled the fundraiser to Florida’s premier golf course and luxury getaway: Mar-a-Lago, just a seven-minute drive away from the originally scheduled venue.
But in the bigger picture, of course President Bergeron is a liberal. Is the Pope Catholic and does the sun rise in the east and set in the west? She is the president of a small liberal arts college in New England, it would be impossible for her to not be liberal. But, in one essential way President Bergeron is distinct from the litany of other self-serious, humorless, stick-in-the-mud college administrators at Connecticut College who could plausibly replace her: President Bergeron is cool.
The @blackvoicesconncoll account invites the entire Connecticut College Community to publicly whine, er… I mean engage in activism against President Bergeron: “we will not let you tarnish [Dean King’s] name.” But this is not new, I’m old enough to remember when college professors at Connecticut College were writing letters publicly whining about President Bergeron being paid more than them (in my opinion, President Bergeron is not paid enough and the slack should come from college professors’ salaries) and when students were publicly whining about President Bergeron on gossip sites like YikYak for whistling and ignoring the college’s own social distancing rules in her interactions with students.
In other words, whining about President Bergeron for being rich (cool) and awesome (whistling, ignoring social distancing). Maybe the next time President Bergeron schedules a get-together at a racist and anti-Semitic social club the Conn community should try something different. In my opinion, they Better Call Saul.
Dear Alphonsus,
No part of the Everglades Club scandal merits praise or superficial sarcasm.
I feel obligated to share my own perspective, and deep resentment, for this morally bankrupt and distasteful article. I am a writer/editor at The Conntrarian, where I tend to shy away from socio political matters. Instead, I write comedy articles, poking fun at the novel parts of the college experience, from my worldview as a Conn College student.
Dean King's resignation follows a reprehensible trend -- our DIEI staff quit because they struggle to make a living, working tirelessly to transform our college into a more inclusive institution.
Events such as the Everglades Club fundraiser undermine that progress, and remind all of us of Conn's *hypocrisy* and *intolerance* of racial and religious diversity. And it's not just President Bergeron's arrangement to host an event at some country club. Upon close inspection, there is a startling discrepancy at hand. Conn's projected progress on diversifying its student body does not align with the truth.
Now is the time for sensitive reflection, working toward funding DIEI and meeting their goals to best shape the College's future. I think most people would agree that - during a time of turbulence - this example of attention seeking, lifeless journalism is harmful. (It is no secret that your intent is harmful).
Fondly,
Peyton
This article reads like it was written by a stroke victim. Incredible stuff by Conns finest.